Turtles on The Simpsons

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The Simpsons have a lot of turtle references. It seems unusually high for a non-recurring 'character'. (Each reference is to a different turtle. I've counted two per season on average.) So far I haven't detected a pattern to when the references occur, but I have my suspicions.

Turtles-Simpsons-08x09-Follow the tortoise.jpg

Episode list

Ep # Episode Title Reference

03x22

The Otto Show
  • Chalkboard gag: "I will not spin the turtle"

04x08

New Kid on the Block
Turtles-Simpsons-04x08-Frying Dutchman.jpg

Decor in the Frying Dutchman includes a turtle in a net.

  • Note: This decor shows up again in a later episode: Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner.

05x13

Homer and Apu
  • Chalkboard gag: "I will not go near the kindergarten turtle"

05x17

Bart Gets an Elephant The Turtle Wax turtle grabs Homer's hair

06x07

Bart's Girlfriend
Turtles-Simpsons-06x07-Wee Tur'les.jpg

After Bart's new girlfriend pulls a fire alarm, Willy attempts to save the wee tur'les.

Willy: If I don't save the wee tur'les, who will? [beat] doh! Save me from the wee tur'les, they were too quick for me aaaggghh...

06x08

Lisa On Ice
Turtles-Simpsons-06x08-Bart's Turtle.jpg

When Bart's team wins a hockey game, Homer pulls out a turtle

Homer: Well Boy, you won, so I'm going to live up to my side of the agreement. Here's your turtle, alive and well.

Turtles-Simpsons-06x08-Gamera.jpg

Meanwhile, Lisa finds she's failing gym class and imagines being impeached from the presidency in the future because she failed gym

Justice: I sentence you to a lifetime of horror on Monster Island. [aside] Don't worry, it's just a name.
Lisa: [running from Gamera] He said it was just a name!
Fellow runner: What he meant was that Monster Island is actually a peninsula.
  • Note: These same kaiju would show up in a later episode: "Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo"

06x20

Two Dozen and One Greyhounds
Turtles-Simpsons-06x20-Turtle's Necks.jpg
Mr. Burns: Some men hunt for sport, others hunt for food. The only thing I'm hunting for, is an outfit that looks good...
See... my... Vest. See my vest.
Made from real gorilla chest.
[...]
Grizzly bear underwear,
Turtle's necks I've got my share.
[...]
but a greyhound fur tuxedo would be best.
So let's prepare these dogs...
Maid: Kill two for matching clogs.
Mr. Burns: See my vest, see my vest, oh please won't you see... my... Vest! I really like the vest.
Smithers: I gathered, yeah...
Lisa: He's gonna make a tuxedo out of our puppies!
Bart: [still humming the tune] Na na na na na na naa naaaa...
Lisa: Bart!
Bart: Sorry... You gotta admit it's catchy.

08x09

El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Homer
Turtles-Simpsons-08x09-Follow the tortoise.jpg

Homer goes on a vision quest after eating the Merciless Peppers of Quetzalsacatanango.

Homer: Huh? A tortoise?! [reading] Follow... the... [gasp] This must be why I'm here! Follow the what!? Follow the what!? Hurry up! [beat] D'Oh!

08x10

The Springfield Files
Turtles-Simpsons-08x10-A turtle's got ahold of my teeth.jpg

Mulder and Scully, while investigating Homer's claim of an alien sighting, run across Abe who's lost his teeth to a turtle.

Abe: For the love of God help me! I've been here for four days and a turtle's got ahold of my teeth! There he is! [high speed chase] [...] Ow! He bit me with my own teeth!

09x17

Lisa the Simpson Lisa reviews Yertle the Turtle, possibly the best book ever written on the subject of turtle stacking.

10x05

When You Dish Upon a Star Snapping turtles chase after Homer

10x23

Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo
Turtles-Simpsons-10x23-Gamera.jpg

Returning from a trip to Tokyo, the plane the Simpsons are on is shaken.

Pilot: Uh, folks, we're experiencing some moderate Godzilla-related turbulence at this time, so I'm going to go ahead and ask you to put your seatbelts back on. When we get to 35 thousand feet, he usually does let go, so from there on out, all we have to worry about is Mothra, and, uh, we do have reports he's tied up with Gamera and Rodan at the present time. Thank you very much.
  • Note: These same kaiju showed up in an earlier episode: "Lisa On Ice"

11x03

Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner
Turtles-Simpsons-11x03-Frying Dutchman.jpg

Turtle decor from the Frying Dutchman

  • Note: This decor shows up in an earlier episode: New Kid on the Block.

11x15

Missionary Impossible
Turtles-Simpsons-11x15-Shell helmet.jpg

Homer wears a turtle-shell helmet in a nod to The Flintstones

11x19

Kill the Alligator and Run After hitting an alligator, Homer dives in the swamp to flee the police and comes up with a few animals biting him, including a little turtle.

12x09

HOMЯ
Turtles-Simpsons-12x09-Leon Uris.jpg
Turtles-Simpsons-12x09-Bite.jpg

Homer has a crayon removed from his brain, improving his intelligence. In a visit to the library we run across Cletus about to make some turtle soup.

Lisa: I think books have an amazing power to bring people together. Look, even Cletus is checking one out.
[Cletus pulls out a turtle and a bib]
Cletus: Now hold still. Nothing cracks a turtle like Leon Uris.
[turtle bites him]
Cletus: Ow! Dangit! [drops book on his finger]
Cletus: Ow!

14x03

Bart vs. Lisa vs. The Third Grade
Turtles-Simpsons-14x03-Third grade turtle.jpg

Bart is demoted to the third grade and Lisa is promoted to the third grade. In the background we see that the third grade classroom has a pet turtle.

  • Note: One of the chalkboard gags indicates that the Kindergarten classroom has a turtle as well. Another chalkboard gag mentions a generic turtle Bart is not supposed to spin. Also, in Bart's Girlfriend, we see that the Science Lab has a lot of "Wee Tur'les".

14x04

Large Marge While Lisa and Homer spend their father-daughter time building a house for Domiciles for the Destitute, Homer paints "El Homo" on the house trying to be cool like "El Barto". Then after realizing how it sounds he desperately paints over it.
Lisa: Dad, you're getting paint on your wedding ring!
Homer: Huh? Oh right. Can you hold it?
Lisa: This is a Band-Aid wrapped in tin foil.
Homer: My real ring's inside a turtle.

Marge thinks she sees Homer flirting and goes to a plastic surgeon to get liposuction, but ends up getting breast implants. Hilarity ensues.

14x06

The Great Louse Detective
Turtles-Simpsons-14x06-Turtle Massage.jpg

Marge goes to a spa and gets a Turtle Massage after which, the turtles are tossed into a bin marked "used turtles."

14x07

Special Edna
"And now, enjoy the soothing music of The Turtles"

(OK, so this reference is cheating since it's referring to the band, not to turtles themselves, but I'm counting it :P)

14x20

Brake My Wife, Please A turtle attacks Bart

14x21

The Bart of War
Turtles-Simpsons-14x21-Turtle impaler.jpg

While cleaning up litter, Kirk Van Houten (leading the Cavalry Kids) accidentally impales a tortoise.

15x12

Milhouse Doesn't Live Here Anymore Milhouse and his mother move to Capital City, leaving Bart to adopt Lisa as his new best friend.
Lisa: The mound builders worshiped turtles as well as badgers, snakes, and other animals.
Bart: Thank god we've come to our senses and worship a carpenter who lived 2000 years ago.

15x16

The Wandering Juvie
Turtles-Simpsons-15x16-Juvie.jpg

Bart gets sent to juvenile hall. Yard equipment includes a rocking turtle.

15x18

Catch 'Em If You Can
Kent Brockman: I guess you can call him "The Little Tortoise That Couldn't"! Check our website for recipes.

16x14

The Seven-Beer Snitch
Turtles-Simpsons-16x14-Apronboobsface.jpg

In order to find out why Snowball likes another family better than the Simpsons, Bart comes up with an excuse to see in their house.

Bart: My baby turtle crawled into your basement window!
Woman: Oh, you poor boy. What's your turtle's name?
Bart: [looking at woman] Uhh... Apronboobsface?
Woman: Really? Well, let's go find him!.

16x15

Future-Drama
Turtles-Simpsons-16x15-HaHaaa.jpg

Bart and Lisa find themselves in Prof. Frink's basement and he uses the science of astrology on his new computer to show them their future, eight years from next Tuesday. At their graduation party, Nelson flees fatherhood on the back of a sea turtle.

16x16

Don't Fear The Roofer
Turtles-Simpsons-16x16-Electroshock.jpg

Homer goes in for electroshock therapy because everyone believes he's crazy. Bart asks him to hold his dead turtle while he's getting shocked to try to revive it.

16x17

The Heartbroke Kid (Unconfirmed. Need to get a screenshot.)

Bart was watching itchy and scratchy. and there was an explosion in itchy and scratchy. for a brief second you could see a DEAD TURTLE hurled across the screen.

17x18

The Wettest Stories Ever Told
Turtles-Simpsons-17x18-Mutiny.jpg

In Mutiny on the Barty (a parody of Mutiny on the Bounty), Skinner gets marooned with Willy, who then maroons him on a turtle.

(Seymour) Bligh: Sing a round!
Willie: Row row row your boat, gently down the stream, Merrily, Merrily, row row, oh so merrily, not so merrily, row row, very merrily... [gives up] I can't do it, sir! I'm just one man!
Bligh: What are you gonna do? Mutiny?
[cuts to Bligh on a sea turtle as Willie rows away]
Bligh: Swim faster or I'll have you made into soup! What are you gonna do? Go underwater?
[the sea turtle does so]
Bligh: [underwater] You call this "deep"?!

17x19

Girls Just Want to Have Sums
Turtles-Simpsons-17x19-Stab-a-Lot.jpg

At the beginning of the episode, the Simpsons are attending Stab-a-Lot: the Itchy and Scratchy Musical (a parody on The Lion King / Spamalot), and an actor in a turtle costume leads the animals down the aisle.

18x04

Treehouse of Horror XVII
Turtles-Simpsons-18x04-I passed out on your turtle.jpg

In the You Gotta Know When To Golem segment, Homer mentions Bart's turtle.

*loud moan*
Homer: [drunk] Bart, there's something I have to tell you, father to son. I passed out on your turtle and killed it. Someday you'll thank me.

18x10

The Wife Aquatic
Turtles-Simpsons-18x10-Carousel.jpg

Marge goes back to a happy place from her childhood, only to find it's not what she remembered. A carousel she loved has a turtle on it. (Need a better image.)

18x12

Little Big Girl
Indian reporter: In the name of the Great Turtle, will you just answer the question!?

18x15

Rome-old and Juli-eh
Turtles-Simpsons-18x15-Old sea turtle.jpg
Marge: Awwww look at Grandpa and Selma frolicking in the water.
Homer: It's not right! It's like an old sea turtle dating a suitcase that fell out of a plane.

(Loved the parody of the Battle of Helm's Deep in this episode.)

 

Unknown

Turtles-Simpsons-Maggie on turtle.jpg
  • I have a Simpsons figure of Maggie on the back of a turtle

Current count: 35 known episodes

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